December 20, 1968

Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday dear Jerry
Happy birthday to you

You'll have to sing it yourself since I don't have the tape recorder yet. Actually you wouldn't want to hear my voice now. It's still rather raspy.

I started smoking again. I have my own theory that the smoke serves as an irritant & helps break up the congestion. I wonder if I could interest medical research in my theory?

That package was insured only because my father mailed it not knowing what was in it & figured it should be insured.

I'll probably start work again tomorrow ... more out of necessity than desire.

The change of environment has also affected my normal physiological process so that my period is 35 days apart and lingers for nine days. Plus I've only had cramps a few hours. I seem to have a good thing going ... a little weird but more comfortable.

I'll bet no none's sex life is more frustrated than that of those trying to get pregnant unsuccessfully. My friend Rosemary has been married since she was 19. She took B.C. pills three years, stopped, & immediately became pregnant. Then she resumed the pill for two years, stopped, & nothing for almost a year. She's becoming very irritated & her dummy doctor gives her a brush-off saying she's not really trying instead of giving her advice. So helpful Hanna told her to keep a graph of her temperature, including the times she has intercourse, & to have intercourse every other night only when she is ovulating. (This probably falls under the category of medical advice, but it isn't going to harm them certainly!) Then if she isn't p.g. she can show her doctor that she was trying and demand that he try to help her. So friends, once again our heroine, Nellie Noble, has stuck her nose where it doesn't belong just asking to have it punched.

Haven't heard from anyone except my one True Fan. Annie Fanny makes me angry; I wanted to talk to her before she left for Hawaii & she didn't sent me her home phone or address. She should be in Pa. a few more days -- maybe she'll write.

What's Will Adams' address? Vicaio Road, but I don't remember the numbers.

The family was considering sitting at a peace table but we couldn't decide on the shape. I think a protean one but they're hard to find.

Love,
Barbara

December 16, 1968

My dearest Jerry,

I feel better today, I think. However, I did have one of my all-time greatest emotional outbursts. My parents started fighting over some stupid thing, & I burst out with a few I-hate-you-both's, I've-hated-you-for-twenty-years, & all-I-want-to-do-is-get-out.

Actually I feel freed of a tremendous weight. It's sad, though. The only worthwhile thing they had were two children & in the end they won't even have them. They'll have nothing.

So I don't know where to go from here, but I'll let you know of any drastic move.

Love,
Barbara

December 15, 1968

Dear Jerry,

There's honest-to-goodness snow outside, a thin blanket of the prettiest light snow I've seen in years. It even stayed on the tree branches & shrubs all day. However, it isn't good packing snow so I'd have no fear of being clobbered with a snowball if you were here.

And I do wish I could be with you again. I miss you & I'm sure that I love you.

The Hunchback of Notre Dame, The Three Worlds of Gulliver, and the Umbrella of Cherbourg were the TV features today. I'm glad the selections were good because I began feeling ill this afternoon & wouldn't dare stick my nose outside the door. I don't know what it is but it consists of fever, aching, & tight chest. Jack & Thurston are the ones holding their own at this time.

December 12, 1968

Found the necklace from Ann.

Dad's better, but Mom & Jack aren't feeling well. Hong Kong flu?

Loved your Christmas cards.

I ordered a tape recorder, but didn't buy it yet. It has an ear piece.

Haven't worked in over a week & no word yet from Yale. I'm not becoming impatient, though ... I really want to spend Christmas at home. However, I will start mailing a few more applications -- to teaching hospitals only -- so that when my money runs out, I won't panic & take a permanent position at the local hospital.

I'd better start wearing gloves & looking for boots (thigh high). It's cold around here. We even had one brief, glorious snow flurry.

Well, I have to flurry to the P.O.

Love,
Barbara

December 10, 1968

Dear Jerry,

Long about now it sho' would be nice to have a sweet-talking gentleman caller bring me a lil' ole piece of hot apple pie and ice cream. Long about now it sho' would be nice to have a sweet-talking gentleman caller.

The unpackers have come and gone. Nothing damaged except my dresser and that can be repaired. Even the roses you bought me in San Francisco are holding their withered own. I did manage to lose the necklace that Ann gave me, though.

I repeated my kitchen goodies & wrapped my few all-time favorite things for storage & narrowed my wardrobe as much as possible.

Something's the matter with Jack. He doesn't like Grump.

Something's really the matter with my father. He's been working very hard the past two months ... now he's sick and won't go to a doctor. Makes me so angry!

December 2, 1968

Dear Jerry,

You'll have to throw the appropriate umm's, er's, & pauses into the following sentences. I feel you know me well enough to do this.

I have a bit of bad news to tell & I know exactly what you'll be saying!

Remember when I told you that I'd get a tape recorder just like mine for you? Huh? Remember that? You see I knew exactly where to go for it  -- my friend's husband has his own business & I probably could have gotten a discount. Anyway we could have sent tapes back and forth -- no problem. Right.

Now don't get angry.

I called this friend today to ask him what speed 1 7/8 was & we chatted on about tape recorders.

Now let me tell you what I'm going to do (before I tell you what I did). I'll buy the exact type tape recorder & mail it to you. OK?

You see I actually have a regular tape recorder. BUT IT'S IN A CARTRIDGE -- really it is. Anyway the tapes aren't compatible.

Maybe the recorder could be a New Year's present (sheepish grin).

Love me even though I did a bad thing?

Love you,
Dummy

October 29, 1968

Hi,

Love dem candlestick holders! They're the greatest I've ever seen. One arrived in perfect condition but the other got its petal points bruised. How have my packages been on arrival?

The three blouses fit perfectly. You must be clairvoyant to have known I'm on a "blouse kick" after three years as a strict sweater girl. Is the mantilla a hint that I pray more often?

Although the roses are the most perfect I've seen next to the real thing, I still doubt that I'll be able to paint them. Thank you for everything, Love.

October 23 and 27, 1968

23 Oct 68
Good Morning, Sweet Baby,

A guilty conscience has forced me to write you the truth. You may disregard the closing of my previous letter (if you haven't already!) I just wanted you to know what it's like to receive a letter with, "I fool around, but I love you" for a closing. That was a pretty dumby thing to do on your part, but I'm sorry I wrote the same thing in retaliation.

October 21, 1968 (practicing!)

Greetings, Oh Loving Sender of Beads,

How's by you? Whatchya been doin'? Ya been eatin' good chow? (practicing some more!)

Actually I've been trying to correct my NY slurring of words and I'm sure I'll be successful. Whatchya think?

The love beads are the most beautiful I've seen and I haven't any others like them. (Glad you didn't send ipel seeds -- I have those.) Thank you for the beads. Thank you for your love.

October 19, 1968

Dear Jerry,

This is a selfish care package. It includes:

October 15, 1968

FIGMO*

Hi Love,

It's been good-news-week. At last some response. I've collected all my data except from Kaiser (screw you, Kaiser!) and I've made my decision.

I'm going to work New York University Medical Center in mid-town Manhattan (actually Washington Square area).

October 8, 1968

Hi Tiger,

That's Sheila's line which she sometimes alternates with "Hi Stud" but she never uses either loud enough for the true recipient to hear ... Chicken!

In the upper right hand corner of your letter which I received today was:
333 DTG
(Counthing today, 30 October, through 31 August)

Does this post-dated letter indicate that I am not to expect any more until November?

Also, call me "Butch" again and you've terminated correspondence.*

October 7, 1968

A review of Rachel, Rachel (In the meter of Humpty Dumpty):

Rachel, Rachel had an affair
Rachel, Rachel didn't take care
All turmoil for naught
For here is the gist
What she thought was a babe
Was merely a cyst.

October 6, 1968

My dearest Jerry,

I hope you haven't had any recurrent episodes of bronchitis or any other malady for that matter.

If I seemed to cut my last letter short, I'm sorry ... the wearies took over.

When do you get your R&R? 3 mo or 6 mo?

October 4, 1968

I heard from Panama today. It's just too military to interest me. I'm sick of having to fill out a million papers every time I turn around.

A letter from your mother arrived today. She seems happy and has received all I mailed to her.

September 29 and 30, October 1-3, 1968

Dear Jerry,

At last, a little something to write about.

Sheila, Mickie, & I saw Sergio Mendes and Brazil 66 with Jose Feliciano at Caesar's Palace last night. I went compliments of Sheila!

No, she has no guilt feelings over that Foxy-Sands deal. It all started this way:

September 26, 1968

My Princely Frog,

I haven't written because I am just now recuperating from a blind weekend ... Fri --> Mon morning sans contacts. It was agony. Had I "offered it up" I would have been eligible for sainthood.

As if being unable to read for three days wasn't bad enough, it's taken four more days to readjust to contacts again.

September 16, 1968

Dear Jerry,

The letters are coming in -- but nothing sounds very encouraging. The State Department has no openings at present and sounds like a glorified Peace Corps, anyway.

Roosevelt in NY and Mass General require shift rotation, one thing I'm trying to get away from. Neither the hospitals themselves, the locations, nor the salaries are very impressive.

However, my first choice was Stanford in Palo Alto. If this place doesn't appear to be better than the others, I'll stay here, work at sunrise, and start classes at Nevada Southern.

September 15, 1968

Dear Jerry,

It's balmy & beautiful outside. Someone on the radio is singing "Sunny" and life is simply good today. I wish you could share this feeling with me.

The days are whipping by, Jerry, and I still have no idea where I'll be going -- no responses as yet from the places I'm interested in. I wrote a letter today for more information about a position in Panama (It's probably a two year or more commitment).

September 11, 1968

Dear Jerry,

At last, a chance to catch my breath. I feel as if I've accomplished nothing today except check with the educational office about the G.I. Bill. I will be eligible for $130/mo. full time; $95 3/4; $60 1/2 for a total of 24 mo. within a 8-year period from D.O.S.

Most of the positions that interest me require at least a B.S. so I may as well get started. I've written for info & interviews with Palo Alto-Stanford Hosp (1st choice), Kaiser in Calif, Roosevelt and Rusk in N.Y., and Mass General. I hope to get some response the end of next week.

September 4, 1968

Dear Jerry,

I just finished that OER due the 6th and while not a literary masterpiece, I think it should meet the approval of one mark-to-the-far-right commander.

Yesterday -- or more precisely last night -- Sheila and I took an art lesson in oils. It was a semi-private lesson given by Mrs. Hurty. I didn't realize that one is permitted to use one's fingers when painting with oils -- but it was easy to regress and throw myself into my work, up to my elbows.

It's a seascape, Pacific Coast I would imagine. I got carried away with the clouds, but the waves are punky. Anyway, this afternoon I bought more equipment (about a lounge show x2's worth!) and am eager to continue.